There’s an Unhinged New Video Game About Trump and the Iran War

一款关于特朗普与伊朗战争的疯狂新游戏问世

A new video game about President Donald Trump’s war in Iran features fights with the pope and New York City mayor Zohran Mamdani. It’s impossible to win, and that’s the point. 一款关于唐纳德·特朗普总统在伊朗发动战争的新电子游戏，包含了与教皇及纽约市议员佐兰·马姆达尼（Zohran Mamdani）的对战情节。这款游戏无法通关，而这正是其核心所在。

The game, Operation Epic Furious: Strait to Hell, was developed by Secret Handshake, an anonymous group of artists behind a handful of satirical works mocking the Trump administration. The group previously installed a gold statue of Trump and Jeffrey Epstein on the National Mall; it portrayed Trump holding onto Epstein in a pose reminiscent of Jack and Rose from the movie Titanic. 这款名为《史诗狂怒行动：地狱海峡》（Operation Epic Furious: Strait to Hell）的游戏由“秘密握手”（Secret Handshake）开发，这是一个匿名的艺术家团体，曾创作过一系列讽刺特朗普政府的作品。该团体此前曾在国家广场（National Mall）放置了一座特朗普与杰弗里·爱泼斯坦（Jeffrey Epstein）的金色雕像；雕像中特朗普抱着爱泼斯坦的姿势，让人联想到电影《泰坦尼克号》中的杰克与露丝。

The game is available to play online, but three fully functional arcade cabinets are currently installed at the Washington, DC, War Memorial and will remain there for the next few days, Secret Handshake said in a press release on Monday. Near the installation, a plaque reads: “The Trump administration knows that the best way to sell combat is by making it a video game, that’s why they’ve been pumping out the ‘sickest’ Iran War video game hype reels. But why stop at clips when you could go full throttle? Introducing Operation Epic Furious: Strait to Hell, a high-octane, flag-waving, boots-on-the-ground simulator where freedom isn’t debated, it’s deployed. No briefings, no hesitation; just pure pixelated patriotism. Strap in and play hard, because this game may never end.” “秘密握手”在周一的新闻稿中表示，该游戏目前已上线，且有三台功能齐全的街机已安装在华盛顿特区的战争纪念馆，并将于未来几天内持续展出。装置旁的一块牌匾上写道：“特朗普政府深知，推销战争的最佳方式就是将其制作成电子游戏，这就是为什么他们一直在大肆宣传那些‘最疯狂’的伊朗战争游戏预告片。但既然可以全速前进，又何必止步于短片呢？隆重推出《史诗狂怒行动：地狱海峡》，这是一款高能、挥舞旗帜、实地作战的模拟器，在这里，自由无需辩论，只需部署。没有简报，没有犹豫；只有纯粹的像素化爱国主义。系好安全带，尽情游玩吧，因为这场游戏可能永远不会结束。”

A still from Operation Epic Furious: Strait To Hell. Courtesy of The Secret Handshake 《史诗狂怒行动：地狱海峡》游戏截图。图片由“秘密握手”提供

In the game, which is visually reminiscent of classic role-playing games like Chrono Trigger, Trump is the playable character, who is on a quest to collect barrels of oil and ideas for Truth Social posts with the goal of reopening the Strait of Hormuz and winning the war. The game features appearances from current and former Trump administration officials like FBI director Kash Patel, secretary of state Marco Rubio, vice president JD Vance, and Elon Musk. These officials aid Trump, who builds strength through combat with enemies like the “Iranian schoolgirl” and “DEIyatollah,” during which he can perform special moves like “Mar-a-Lazer.” Throughout the game, Trump’s social media posts do little to move the needle, creating an endless cycle of tasks and threats that ultimately lead nowhere. 这款游戏在视觉上让人想起《时空之轮》（Chrono Trigger）等经典角色扮演游戏。玩家扮演特朗普，任务是收集石油桶和“真实社交”（Truth Social）的发帖灵感，目标是重新开放霍尔木兹海峡并赢得战争。游戏中出现了现任及前任特朗普政府官员，如联邦调查局局长卡什·帕特尔（Kash Patel）、国务卿马尔科·鲁比奥（Marco Rubio）、副总统JD·万斯（JD Vance）以及埃隆·马斯克（Elon Musk）。这些官员会协助特朗普，而特朗普则通过与“伊朗女学生”和“DEIyatollah”（对DEI政策的讽刺称呼）等敌人的战斗来增强实力，期间他还能施展“海湖庄园激光”（Mar-a-Lazer）等特殊招式。在整个游戏过程中，特朗普的社交媒体帖子几乎无法改变局势，从而形成了一个最终毫无结果的、无休止的任务与威胁循环。

Even if the game is unwinnable, players can lose, and do so abruptly. The game opens up in the White House, where Trump can speak with his wife, Melania. “I WAS NEVER ON THE EPSTEIN JET,” she announces with no provocation, before asking, “Did you burn the files yet?” The sequence is seemingly poking fun at a surprise press conference the first lady gave addressing the Epstein Files last month. The player, as Trump, can tell her that they are in the process of burning the files—something they can, in fact, do—or ask if they can hold hands. If the player selects the second option, the game ends. 尽管游戏无法通关，但玩家却可以输掉，而且输得非常突然。游戏开场于白宫，特朗普可以与妻子梅拉尼娅交谈。她毫无征兆地宣布：“我从未登上过爱泼斯坦的飞机”，随后问道：“你把那些文件烧了吗？”这一情节似乎是在嘲讽第一夫人上个月就“爱泼斯坦文件”所召开的突发新闻发布会。作为特朗普的玩家，可以选择告诉她正在销毁文件（事实上玩家确实可以这么做），或者询问是否可以牵手。如果玩家选择了第二个选项，游戏便会结束。

Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth appears in Operation Epic Furious: Strait To Hell. Courtesy of The Secret Handshake 国防部长皮特·海格塞斯（Pete Hegseth）出现在《史诗狂怒行动：地狱海峡》中。图片由“秘密握手”提供