Experience: We found a baby on the subway – now he’s our 26-year-old son

经历：我们在地铁里发现了一个婴儿——如今他已是我们 26 岁的儿子

‘I was in shock, my heart racing’: Danny Stewart (left) and his husband, Pete. “我当时处于震惊之中，心跳加速”：丹尼·斯图尔特（左）和他的丈夫皮特。

In the summer of 2000, I could never have imagined becoming a father. I was 34, living in New York City, with a good job in social care, but still in a tiny apartment. I had been with my partner, Pete, for just over three years; we were serious, but we didn’t live together. Becoming a parent was not on my radar. 2000 年的夏天，我从未想过自己会成为一名父亲。当时我 34 岁，住在纽约市，在社会福利部门有一份不错的工作，但仍住在一间狭小的公寓里。我和伴侣皮特在一起刚满三年；我们的关系很认真，但并没有住在一起。成为父母从未在我的考虑范围内。

One August evening, I had finished work late and was hurrying to a dinner reservation I had with Pete. I was rushing towards the turnstile at Union Square station when I noticed a bundle of clothes in a corner. I saw it move and stopped in my tracks. I walked over, peeled back a dark sweatshirt, and saw him: a newborn baby, with the umbilical cord still attached. 八月的一个晚上，我下班很晚，正匆忙赶去和皮特赴约吃晚餐。当我冲向联合广场车站的闸机时，注意到角落里有一团衣服。我看到它动了一下，便停下了脚步。我走过去，掀开一件深色的运动衫，看到了他：一个刚出生的婴儿，脐带还连在身上。

I was in shock. I sprinted up to the street and found a payphone to call 911. “I found a baby,” I blurted out. I rushed back to the platform and crouched down next to the baby. I stroked his head to comfort him but he pulled a face. “OK, you don’t like that,” I said. We stared at each other. My heart was racing. 我惊呆了。我冲上街道，找到一个公用电话拨打了 911。“我发现了一个婴儿，”我脱口而出。我跑回站台，蹲在婴儿身边。我抚摸他的头想安慰他，但他做了一个鬼脸。“好吧，你不喜欢这样，”我说。我们对视着。我的心跳得飞快。

It felt like hours, but it was probably only a few minutes before the police arrived. I had to give a statement, and went home for a large drink. Pete and I talked all night; why would the mother have left the baby, why had she chosen to leave him here, in the centre of gay New York? 感觉过了好几个小时，但其实警察可能只用了几分钟就赶到了。我做了笔录，然后回家喝了一大杯酒。我和皮特彻夜长谈；为什么母亲会抛弃这个孩子？为什么她偏偏选择把他留在这里，留在这个纽约同性恋文化中心？

After a short period of media interest, life returned to normal, until 12 weeks later, when I was asked to testify at a court hearing as the mother could not be found. To my surprise, the judge asked if I had any interest in adopting the baby. The idea hadn’t even entered my head, but instantly, I desperately wanted to say yes. I told her I needed to talk to my partner but, in my own mind, I had decided that was what I wanted to do. 在媒体短暂的关注后，生活恢复了平静。直到 12 周后，由于一直找不到孩子的母亲，我被要求出席法庭听证会作证。令我惊讶的是，法官问我是否有意领养这个孩子。这个念头此前从未在我脑海中出现过，但那一瞬间，我迫切地想要答应。我告诉法官我需要和伴侣商量，但在心里，我已经决定这就是我想做的事。

Pete was furious. We had never talked about starting a family. We were in debt – there were a hundred reasons why bringing a child into our lives did not seem sensible. But I was convinced. 皮特非常生气。我们从未讨论过组建家庭的事。我们还背负着债务——有一百个理由说明让一个孩子进入我们的生活是不理智的。但我心意已决。

Pete agreed to visit the baby in foster care with me. As soon as I saw him, I took him in my arms. “Remember me?” I said. Pete says when he held the baby, every morsel of resistance instantly evaporated. We left that house united. 皮特同意和我一起去寄养家庭看望这个孩子。一见到他，我就把他抱在怀里。“还记得我吗？”我说。皮特说，当他抱起孩子时，他所有的抵触情绪瞬间烟消云散。我们离开那所房子时，心意已合。

We were called back to court on 20 December, and granted custody. “How would you like him for the holidays?” the judge asked. We bought parenting books and read them cover to cover in 24 hours, and I moved into Pete’s flat. 12 月 20 日，我们被传唤回法庭，并获得了监护权。“你们想让他陪你们过节吗？”法官问道。我们买了育儿书，在 24 小时内从头到尾读完，然后我搬进了皮特的公寓。

We named him Kevin. Pete had an older brother named Kevin who had died before he was born, and his parents always said he had a guardian angel named Kevin watching over him. 我们给他取名凯文。皮特有一个哥哥叫凯文，在皮特出生前就去世了，他的父母总是说，他有一位名叫凯文的守护天使在保佑着他。

Taking baby Kevin home was incredible but terrifying, as it is for any new parent; but, unlike them, we’d had just a day to prepare. For weeks, we took it in turns to sit up round the clock with him to make sure he was still breathing. 把小凯文带回家既美妙又令人恐惧，这对任何新手父母来说都是如此；但与他们不同的是，我们只有一天的时间做准备。接下来的几周里，我们轮流彻夜守着他，确保他呼吸正常。

We wanted to make sure Kevin knew he was wanted and loved, so we wrote a story for him about how we became a family. He made us read it over and over, and took it to school. 我们想确保凯文知道他是被期待和被爱的，所以我们为他写了一个关于我们如何成为一家人的故事。他让我们一遍又一遍地读给他听，还把它带到了学校。

When Kevin was 11, New York legalised same-sex marriage, and we told Kevin we would like to get married. He said, “Don’t judges marry people?”, and suggested the judge who asked us if we wanted to adopt him. We were delighted when she agreed to do so. 凯文 11 岁时，纽约州将同性婚姻合法化，我们告诉凯文我们想结婚。他说：“法官不是可以主持婚礼吗？”，并建议邀请那位问我们是否愿意领养他的法官。当她欣然同意时，我们感到非常高兴。

Not everything has been easy. When he was a teenager, he had a lot of questions about his birth mother. He wanted to put up posters in the subway, and we would notice him looking at strangers’ faces to see if they looked like him. He’s made peace with the situation now, though. 并非一切都一帆风顺。当他十几岁时，他对自己的生母有很多疑问。他曾想在地铁里张贴寻人启事，我们也会注意到他盯着陌生人的脸看，想看看他们是否长得像他。不过，他现在已经与这一切和解了。

Pete’s written a memoir, and we also turned the story we wrote for Kevin into a children’s book and had a short animation made. We want other children to understand there are lots of ways to become a family. 皮特写了一本回忆录，我们还把为凯文写的故事改编成了一本儿童读物，并制作了一部短动画。我们希望其他孩子能明白，组建家庭的方式有很多种。

Now, Kevin is an incredible young man and we are tremendously proud of him. He works out of state as a software developer but, fortunately, he is still happy to spend time with his dads. 如今，凯文已经是一位出色的年轻人，我们为他感到无比自豪。他在外州担任软件开发人员，但幸运的是，他依然乐于和他的爸爸们共度时光。

Even 26 years later, we can’t quite believe that, by some miracle, it was us who were given the privilege of being part of Kevin’s life. How lucky we are. 即使 26 年过去了，我们仍不敢相信，奇迹般地，竟然是我们获得了成为凯文生命一部分的殊荣。我们是多么幸运。