Windows 11½

Windows 11½ Preparing your ad experience… Unofficial parody · Not affiliated with Microsoft Windows 11½ 正在准备您的广告体验……非官方恶搞作品 · 与微软无关

🌐Microsoft Edge ☁️OneDrive 🧠Recall 🗑️Recycle Bin 📎Clippy 365 🛍️Microsoft Store 📼Totally Normal Video 🌐Microsoft Edge ☁️OneDrive 🧠Recall（回顾） 🗑️回收站 📎回形针助手 365 🛍️Microsoft Store 📼完全正常的视频

Activate Windows. Go to Settings to activate Windows. Definitely Not Windows · Unofficial parody 激活 Windows。请前往“设置”以激活 Windows。绝对不是 Windows · 非官方恶搞作品

⊞ 🔎 🌐 🟦W 🟩E 🟪T ✨ 📎 🛍️ ⌃📶🔊🔋 SoundMute 🔊38% Play test sound ⊞ 🔎 🌐 🟦W 🟩E 🟪T ✨ 📎 🛍️ ⌃📶🔊🔋 静音 🔊38% 播放测试声音

Windows 11½ uses suspiciously original system sounds so the lawyers can relax. Windows 11½ 使用了“极其原创”的系统声音，好让律师们放心。

🔎 Pinned All apps › 🌐Edge 🟦WWord 🟩EExcel 📧Outlook 🟪TTeams ✨Copilot 📎Clippy 365 ⚙️Settings 📊Task Manager ☁️OneDrive 🧠Recall 🔄Update 🧮Calculator 🛍️Store 🃏Solitaire 💣Minesweeper 📝Notepad 🎨Paint 🛡️Security 🖼️Photos ✂️Snipping Tool 🎮Xbox ℹ️About 📼Totally Normal Video 🔎 已固定 所有应用 › 🌐Edge 🟦WWord 🟩EExcel 📧Outlook 🟪TTeams ✨Copilot 📎回形针助手 365 ⚙️设置 📊任务管理器 ☁️OneDrive 🧠回顾 🔄更新 🧮计算器 🛍️商店 🃏纸牌 💣扫雷 📝记事本 🎨画图 🛡️安全中心 🖼️照片 ✂️截图工具 🎮Xbox ℹ️关于 📼完全正常的视频

Recommended More › 🛍️Temu Because apparently Windows is a shopping mall now 🎮Solitaire Collection The card game now has a monetization department. 📄Your actual file We buried the useful thing under recommendations 💳Microsoft 365 You already pay for this. Pay harder. 推荐 更多 › 🛍️Temu 因为显然 Windows 现在是个购物中心 🎮纸牌合集 这款纸牌游戏现在有了专门的变现部门。 📄您的实际文件 我们把有用的东西埋在了推荐内容下面 💳Microsoft 365 您已经付过钱了。请付得更用力些。

🙂Local Account (for now) Power options 🌙 Sleep Shut down ↻ Restart 🟠 Update and shut down (estimated 4 min) 🟠 Update and restart (estimated 4 min) 🙂本地账户（暂时） 电源选项 🌙 睡眠 关机 ↻ 重启 🟠 更新并关机（预计 4 分钟） 🟠 更新并重启（预计 4 分钟）

✕Clippy · Windows 11½ Guide Hi, I’m Clippy. I’m here to help you get started with Windows 11½. ✕回形针助手 · Windows 11½ 指南 你好，我是回形针助手。我来帮你上手 Windows 11½。

365 View ▸ Sort by ▸ Refresh Ask Copilot about this desktop New ▸ Display settings Personalize ℹ️ About Windows 11½ — Definitely Not Windows—▢✕ 365 视图 ▸ 排序方式 ▸ 刷新 向 Copilot 询问有关此桌面的信息 新建 ▸ 显示设置 个性化 ℹ️ 关于 Windows 11½ — 绝对不是 Windows—▢✕

11½ Definitely Not Windows Windows 11½ The operating system Microsoft definitely did not make. Yes, this is a parody. 11½ 绝对不是 Windows Windows 11½ 微软绝对没有制作的操作系统。是的，这是一个恶搞作品。

Definitely Not Windows / Windows 11½ is an independent, unofficial parody project created for humor, satire, and commentary. It is not affiliated with, endorsed by, sponsored by, or approved by Microsoft Corporation. “绝对不是 Windows / Windows 11½”是一个独立的、非官方的恶搞项目，旨在进行幽默、讽刺和评论。它与微软公司无关，未得到其认可、赞助或批准。

What this is: A fake operating-system experience making fun of modern software subscriptions, ads, AI features, updates, storage nags, and the tiny emotional journey involved in changing your default browser. 这是什么：一个虚假的操作系统体验，旨在嘲讽现代软件订阅、广告、AI 功能、更新、存储空间催促，以及更改默认浏览器时那段微小的情感历程。

What this is not: A real Microsoft product, service, login page, update, store, security warning, or subscription offer. Please do not give Clippy your password or credit card. He has not completed compliance training. 这不是什么：真正的微软产品、服务、登录页面、更新、商店、安全警告或订阅优惠。请不要把密码或信用卡交给回形针助手。它还没完成合规培训。

Clippy’s visitor ledger: Your browser gets a random anonymous ID so Clippy can assign it a persistent visitor number. The ledger is checking your file now. No name, email, password, or browser fingerprint is needed. Why would you do that? Because a paperclip remembering that you are Visitor #… is funnier than a normal hit counter. 回形针助手的访客账本：您的浏览器会获得一个随机匿名 ID，以便回形针助手为您分配一个持久的访客编号。账本正在检查您的文件。无需姓名、电子邮件、密码或浏览器指纹。为什么要这样做？因为一个记得你是“第 X 号访客”的回形针，比普通的点击计数器更有趣。

Trademark note: Microsoft, Windows, Microsoft 365, Edge, Outlook, OneDrive, Teams, Xbox, and other referenced product names and marks belong to their respective owners. They are referenced here to identify the subjects of parody and commentary. No endorsement is implied. Any resemblance to a stable, predictable operating system is purely coincidental. 商标声明：Microsoft、Windows、Microsoft 365、Edge、Outlook、OneDrive、Teams、Xbox 以及其他引用的产品名称和标志均属于其各自所有者。此处引用仅为标识恶搞和评论的对象。不暗示任何背书。与任何稳定、可预测的操作系统有任何相似之处纯属巧合。

Extremely serious legal notes: This site is a joke. Buttons may pretend to install apps, sell subscriptions, break Windows, summon AI, or ruin your evening with an update. None of those actions are real. No Microsoft credentials are requested or required. 极其严肃的法律说明：本网站是个玩笑。按钮可能会假装安装应用、销售订阅、破坏 Windows、召唤 AI，或者用更新毁掉您的夜晚。这些操作都不是真的。不需要也不要求提供任何微软凭据。

🌐 Microsoft Edge — Recommended by Microsoft, your mother, and Microsoft—▢✕ 🌐 Microsoft Edge — 由微软、您的母亲以及微软推荐 —▢✕

🌐Whoa there. You appear to be downloading another browser. Microsoft Edge uses the same technology as Chrome, except we’re already here and harder to remove. Use Microsoft Edge Continue to Chrome anyway Browser-choice guilt will appear here. 🌐等等。您似乎正在下载另一个浏览器。Microsoft Edge 使用与 Chrome 相同的技术，不同之处在于我们已经在这里了，而且更难卸载。使用 Microsoft Edge 仍然继续下载 Chrome 此处将显示“浏览器选择愧疚感”。

🟦 W Document1 — Word—▢✕ … ⚠ Editing is disabled. Your Microsoft 365 subscription is active, but Word would like you to prove it again. Sign in to activate Ask me every 4 minutes You can still admire the document you’re apparently not allowed to edit. 🟦 W 文档1 — Word—▢✕ … ⚠ 编辑已禁用。您的 Microsoft 365 订阅处于活动状态，但 Word 希望您再次证明这一点。登录以激活 每 4 分钟询问我一次 您仍然可以欣赏这份显然不允许您编辑的文档。

🟩 E Book1 — Excel—▢✕ … 9 Total #SUBSCRIPTION! Upgrade to calculate Upgrade Microsoft 365 to use SUM() 🟩 E 工作簿1 — Excel—▢✕ … 9 总计 #订阅！ 升级以进行计算 升级 Microsoft 365 以使用 SUM() 函数。

📧 Outlook (new) (not the old new one)—▢✕ … Mailbox: 14.99 GB of 15 GB Microsoft recommends panicking. … Mailbox almost full You have 10.2 MB remaining. That’s enough for approximately one email from Teams containing a 9 MB company logo. 📧 Outlook（新版）（不是那个旧的新版）—▢✕ … 邮箱：14.99 GB / 15 GB 微软建议您感到恐慌。 … 邮箱几乎已满 您还剩 10.2 MB。这大约只够接收一封来自 Teams 的包含 9 MB 公司 Logo 的邮件。

✨ Microsoft Copilot (Preview of the preview)—▢✕ … Hi! I’m Copilot. I can summarize your files, rewrite your emails, rearrange your settings, and occasionally answer the question you asked. ✨ Microsoft Copilot（预览版的预览）—▢✕ … 你好！我是 Copilot。我可以总结您的文件、重写您的邮件、重新排列您的设置，并偶尔回答您提出的问题。